The Aerie
So I bought a new car.
Well, okay, no, I didn't buy a new car, I bought a replacement used car to the '96 Geo Metro that I've been driving for the past six or seven years.
This was, of course, a wacky, foolish thing to do. The Metro works, and I'm between jobs, so I'm spending savings to buy something that I don't strictly need. Actually, this is the first time I've ever bought a car that I didn't strictly need. Normally I would drive my existing car solidly into the ground before replacing it - a highlight of my car purchases has always been needing to find a ride to the dealership. But in this case, no. Maybe it's age, maybe it's an arrogant confidence that work will make itself available (and honestly the phone has been ringing off the hook with job offers), or maybe I'm simply tired of the Metro.
Today I went to the dealership simply to pick up the $5 that the flyer offered "just for coming in," and of course they got me to buy something. I've given up even thinking I'm clever enough to outwit car salesmen - nowadays I just show up, turn around, and grab my ankles.
But I really did need to replace the Metro, even if it presently still runs.
To start with, the Metro is not and never has been very safe. When you drive a Geo Metro, you're always one bad driver away from the grave. And I have sufficient doubts that the airbags in that car would function that I've toyed with the idea of running the car into a boulder at 35 mph just to find out for sure.
Also, the Metro is noisy, to say nothing of hot and cramped. Hot and cramped I'm accustomed to: the idea of cars-with-air-conditioning is not native to my generation. Air conditioning is itself not part of my personal heritage. Air conditioning was one of those hedonistic indulgences, like boats and lake cabins, of The Wealthy or of our neighbors living-above-their-means. Privileged neighbors had air conditioning units in their windows: the term "central air" was reserved for those with circular driveways and footmen.
So the idea of owning a vehicle with A/C just seems improper somehow. But the new car has A/C.
The new car can also fit the entire family. This used to be the case with the Metro, but with three increasingly large teens-and-pre-teens in the household, (to say nothing of the ever-inflating adult population) the inside of the Metro was shrinking rapidly. And there's no denying that the Metro never seated all five of us safely. My entire posterity was on the line whenever we had to crowd into the thing together.
So I am thoroughly tired of driving the hot, cramped, unsafe and noisy Metro. It was always supposed to be my "temporary" car, when I picked it up in 1999. Just a disposable vehicle until I started making a little money. Obviously that took longer than I thought, but there were things about the Metro that I liked, too.
I liked its tiny size - you can park a Metro anywhere, and squeeze through openings otherwise reserved for motorcycles. I liked its gas mileage. As gas prices have climbed, my cost at the pump has skyrocketed from $12... to $18 a tank. When you can fill the car for under $20 and drive on that for over a week, these days, then there's a lot to like.
As for what I purchased... um...
I don't know.
No, no, I mean, I like the car and all, I don't have any doubts about it. It's just that, uh, I can't precisely remember the make and model of the car.
That, by the way, is a sign of the kind of man I am. Absentminded, yes, that's already established. But more to the point, what kind of guy doesn't recall a few hours later the make and model of the car he just bought? I have this notion that most guys would know the make, model, engine displacement, torque, horsepower, and gear ratios of the car. I know I bought a brown ("cinnamon", the salesguy called 'Whitey' kept telling me) four-door Plymouth sedan with moderately good gas mileage (25/31 as compared to the Metro's measured 31/36). I'm satisfied with that.
So it's still at the dealer, getting cleaned up. I'll probably take it past the mechanic tomorrow before I sign the papers. But if everything works out, I'll soon be trying to find something to do with a five-speed 1996 Geo Metro with an aluminum-foil sheet bolted over a cracked front bumper.
Anybody need a cheap cramped noisy hot unsafe car? It gets good gas mileage!
Posted by Albatross at July 19, 2005 1:23 AM